I just need some time

I never knew I could be so wrong,
but you showed me.
I never thought I could be so heartless
but then "they" made me.
I love the way you love me,
and I couldn't stand if you didn't.
I know I can't be with you
but don't you ever dare leave me.
I'm used to your love,
And I'm used to not showing mine.
But I love you, and you know it

I just need some time
Time to figure things out
Time to show my siblings the path
Time to make my career, sing and dance
Time to show my parents you are not what they think you are
Then I'll be yours, you'll be mine, forever and ever, till eternity

Disguised

She stands elegantly disguised
Riding high on mighty waves
Covers herself with shallow warmth
quiet, proud, and brave

She looks around her
Waves of laughter passing her by
Holds to her secret tightly
Light is in short supply

The dreaded moment arrives
Inner cold escapes in the form of tears
And she silently sobs and weeps
None pays heed, darkness nears

But they'll never listen
Her pride won't let her speak
She'll end up alone, unnoticed
forgotten, unloved and weak

Grass is always greener on the other side

Shining in the distance
They see a beacon of happiness
It flashes and then is gone
Enticing them, exploiting weakness

So many seeking happiness,
yet none have a clue or trail
and if not found amid the world
they say its the "holy grail"

None content with what they have
Living like nomads, never do they bide
I hope its not too late when they realize
the grass is always greener on the other side

Bittersweet jealousy

I should not care
about the person you see
But why does your seeking of others
create this confusion in me

I am stuck behind this blue screen
I wish it did not bother me
But it does
Am I jealous?

My mind has created
a faultless image of his
Cause I know you deserve the best
and this my eye does envy

It's creeping up inside of me,
the feelings only get worse.
I want to shout out loud,
want my voice to be heard.

May be I am jealous
Jealous because he gets
to walk with you, be with you
While I watch and wait

If it is jealousy
I'd like to call it bittersweet
It makes me realise how precious
yo are, made me an aesthete

You must do what you do
I will never ask you to alter
I'll wait for you
From summer solstice to winter

My heart says don't worry boy
some day we'll be together
I'd love being with you
be it sunny, rainy or cloudy weather

My hero

You are my hero, Dad
You're my strong foundation.
When I think of you,
It gives me determination

You lovingly guide me
and are stern at times too
You make my life better
I owe my identity to you

You are my hero, Dad
You always wish my happiness
And shower your blessings
your love and your kindness

I am scared when you are far
I feel safe with you
You always protect me
and undo my mistakes too

You have been my hero, Dad
right from the very start
You always know what I want
before I even say a word

At times we have our differences
you get angry, making me sad
I may not be the best son
But I love you a lot, Dad

I want to fulfil your dreams
comfort you, love you always
I want to make you proud
and give you a great father's day

Hope amidst despair

I thought I had lost you
Whatever little was mine
Sorrow crushed my soul
despair and doom intertwine

Your sweet voice, dear
Is what makes my clock tick
If I have wronged you somehow
It is forgiveness I seek

Seeing you in grief
throws me into exile
I care too much about you,
I want you to laugh, to smile

You are my inspiration
You are my motivation
But you seem so distant
an unexplained aberration

You are the fuel driving me
My angel in Lucifer's lair
You make the air worth breathing
You are my hope amidst despair

Goodnight

"Goodnight" you say
"Goodnight" say I
what a wonderful night
none can deny

Sweet dreams dear
fall into slumber's embrace
I'll keep you in my heart
An epitome of elegance and grace

I look out of the window
It is almost dawn
My eyes are drowsy
and the lips part to yawn

Your sweet voice
still ringing in my ears
I close my eyes
your portrait appears

Another day will begin soon
and bring shining light
I'll wait for the phone to ring
Sleep tight, heart. Goodnight

across infinitude

Where did you go?
Where did you disappear?
Burning sensation in my chest
I can hardly bear

My heart burns in flames
Sparks and smoke rise
Throbbing faster and faster
Your picture just cant suffice

I want to loose myself
like the smoke gets lost in the sky

I want to become your cloak

protect you from rain and dry

I wish I could be smoke
I'd go wherever you are
Floating close to you always
Lingering near, never far

Until I find my peace
Until I receive beatitude
I am a lighthouse of your image
as I burn across infinitude

~ROMANSICK~

I hear your lovely voice
The frabjous hour of all
Happiness smiles at me fondly
All my senses you enthrall

Time flies on cupids wings
I get lost in your every word
My lonely heart rejoices
sweetest sound I ever heard

I am left pondering later
And for a minute I am okay
Sooner or later the joy subsides
and the happiness goes away

Your voice had warmed my
estranged and desolated heart
The avalanche of sorrow
turn it to stone and tear it apart

Strange emotions stir in my soul
My life enters a state of commotion
Everything seems worthless
I doubt each and every notion

I meekly sit and watch
as my body helplessly drains
Life swings like a pendulum
to and fro between joy and pain

I am too shy to say
but i want you to know
Nothing can compare to you
I am living in your afterglow

When I talk to you
time flies away, doesnt tick
Something has happened for sure
my friends say I am romansick

I will possess your heart

Stars blaze in the darkness
A trillion asterisks without exclamation
Each gives me a glimpse of you
You are my constellation

The moon shines brightly
Like a beautiful fairy
My jaws drop open in awe
while my heart makes merry

For I see you in the moon
Its your smile in the crescent
Full moon shows me your face
Clouds cover you,cruel and indecent

How long seems the night
if you are kept awake by pain
But the dawn seems to rush
when heart is cheerful,mind sane

I am tired, my arm aches
But sleep evades my eyes
Lost in your thoughts
marvelling you and the nightsky

I believe that night is richer
and vividly colored than the day
It acts both as a healer of sorrow
and a scroll of ideas that noon mislay

The twilight sings lullaby
Eyes are drowsy,arm stiff
I am grateful to your creator
As I strive to evade sleep

My heart longs for you
soft whispers, yet far apart
All I need is one chance
and I will possess your heart

When will pigs fly

In countless dreams I have seen
we’ll be together, sun or rain
Why haven't they come true
it is impossible to explain

I’ll wait for them to come true
I’ll wait for that joyous day
When we’ll laugh, scream and
cry together, come what may

We’d be together
until the end of time
I’ll be yours till eternity,
Forever you’ll be mine

Dawn is about to break
The horizon is getting red
I have waited long in dark
Still my fate I dread

Anxiety crushes me now
days are hard to get by
Each moment I ponder
When will pigs fly

I will miss you when I wake up

I lean upon my pillow
by flickering light
Sailing into sweet oblivion
this lonely night

You descend into my dreams
bathed in moonlights shower
Your face still fairer
than a peach tree flower

Our hearts our soul
hear the same tune
We dance hand in hand
my greatest fortune

You're in my dreams
my feelings I can't dout
It gets me through the day
You are all I think about

Although I can not see you
and you are so far away
I close my eyes, there you are
All my frights, fears allay

Until "then" I hold you in my dreams
lying on my bed like a dollop
In my dreams we are together, forever
but I will miss you when I wake up